500. I'm Not Stiller

I'm Not Stiller
Max Frisch
1954
Around 390 pages

500. Well, I'm not going to lie to you, it hasn't been easy. Some of the older books have gone into the literary equivalent of the Witness Protection Program, while others take 4,391 words to complete a single sentence. But in all the muck, I have found some really special treasures. It's like in Trainspotting when Mark Renton reaches into the filthy toilet to retrieve his drugs. We can look forward to encountering that scene, and I'm sure many other disgusting moments, during the latter half of this List. I can't wait!

Anyway, I'm Not Stiller kind of fumbled the ball for holding the honor of the big five hundo. Our narrator, James Larkin White, is arrested upon arriving to Switzerland. The authorities claim he is a missing sculptor, Anatol Ludwig Stiller, a claim corroborated by Stiller's wife and friends as well.

I find stories about mistaken identity rather tedious; it's frustrating to have our main character have to keep denying/claiming the same thing again and again, without getting anywhere. I suppose that's the point, and Frisch does lean into the Kakfa-esque nightmarish aspect of being entombed alive by crushing bureaucracy. But that's not the fun kind of horror, where body parts are flying and mad axe men are on the loose. 

I don't want to give away any spoilers, but I do find it interesting that two books lately (this and Self-Condemned) have featured characters who regret their lack of action during the war. It's a different kind of sadness than the kind we read from authors with combat experience. So I guess you are doomed to guilt, no matter what you do.

Here's to the next 500! And fuck that last one.

 

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

There have been attempts to adapt this into film but none have been successful.

UP NEXT: The Ragazzi by Pier Paulo Pasolini

499. Self-Condemned

Self-Condemned
Wyndham Lewis

1954
Around 440 pages

I am more excited about finally finishing all the Wyndham Lewis novels on the List than I am about reaching the big 500. I can't even dignify him with an official ranking, because I was bored with all of his novels equally. This might have been the least dull of the bunch, but maybe I was just relieved we were finally saying goodbye to this drone.

It's 1939, and Rene Harding knows a war is coming. He decides to leave his job as a professor in London and move to Canada, without consulting his wife. Wyndham Lewis called Canada "a sanctimonious ice-box." I guess he just hated everybody (but mostly Jews).  Rene is an unbearably selfish and controlling character, which I suppose makes sense, as this seems like autobiographical account of Lewis's actions during the war.

More than his other novels, Self-Condemned reminded me of Ayn Rand. Both writers are severe and tend to digress into lengthy political rants. Thankfully this List spares us from Ayn, but we weren't so lucky with ole Wyndham. 

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

In his essay "Good Bad Books", George Orwell says of Lewis "Enough talent to set up dozens of ordinary writers has been poured into Wyndham Lewis's so-called novels… Yet it would be a very heavy labour to read one of these books right through. Some indefinable quality, a sort of literary vitamin, which exists even in a book like If Winter Comes, is absent from them."

UP NEXT: I'm Not Stiller by Max Frisch

498. Bonjour Tristesse

Bonjour Tristesse
Francoise Sagan
1954
Around 155 pages

Okay, now I am really starting to get insecure with this string of fantastic debut novels. Francoise Sagan was only 19 when she wrote this, and apparently it was an overnight sensation. As the story is told from the perspective of Cecile, a 17-year-old, Sagan's youth really makes Cecile feel authentic. 

Cecile spends her summer with her philandering father Raymond and his current mistress Elsa. Cecile enjoys their non taxing lifestyle in a villa on the French Riviera. Cecile feels their way of life is threatened after Raymond becomes engaged to Anne, a friend of his late wife. Cecile determines to break them up, Parent Trap style. Well, not quite, but she does exploit Raymond's jealousy to drive Anne crazy.

Cecile's actions are selfish, but Sagan manages to make her sympathetic, because of her youth, inexperience, and subjugation to an irresponsible father. Although I do appreciate Raymond justifying his cheating by quoting Oscar Wilde. Unfortunately, Sagan never achieved the same level of success with any other novel, but this is still an impressive story to hang your hat on. 

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

Adapted into a movie by Otto Preminger in 1958, starring Deborah Kerr.

UP NEXT: Self Condemned by Wyndham Lewis

497. Lord of the Flies

Lord of the Flies
William Golding
1954
Around 185 pages

This is another one that is often on school's reading list, although at least this novel features children, so its placement is more understandable than say, making us reading Antigone. And who doesn't enjoy a good survival story?

During a wartime evacuation, a plane crashes on a remote island in the Pacific, with the only survivors being young boys. Ralph is elected leader, and the boys use the glasses of an overweight boy called, sigh, Piggy to start a fire. In Flaubert's Parrot, Julian Barnes points out that Piggy's glasses wouldn't actually start a fire, because he was nearsighted, so the light would be diverged, not focused to a point. Everybody's a critic, I guess. Anyway, the boys come to be convinced that there is a beast on the island, and one of the boys, Jack, gains popularity by declaring his intention to kill it. Fortunately, Golding is better at wrapping up his story than the writers of Lost.

This novel always gave me Animal Farm vibes. Both authors are proving that no matter what the external circumstances are, human beings will always behave in a certain way that will end in their own destruction. Although I guess Golding was proven wrong when a group of boys did get marooned on an island in 1965 and were all rescued in good health. 

An allegory for fear mongering and dictatorship is never irrelevant, but it hits different in the aftermath of World War II. Very impressive, considering this is his debut novel.

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

"Lord of the Flies" is a direct translation of Beelzebub, one of the seven princes of Hell.

Initially had a cool reception, until E.M. Forster chose it as one of his novels of the year.

UP NEXT: Bonjour Tristesse by Francoise Sagan

496. Under the Net

Under the Net
Iris Murdoch
1954
Around 250 pages

She's here, she's finally here! Iris Murdoch is one of my favorite authors/philosophers and unlike ordinary mortals, she does not need a few novels to find her footing. I do find comfort in the fact that she was 35 when she wrote her first novel, otherwise I would really feel hopeless. 

Jake Donaghue is a struggling writer (aren't we all) who suddenly finds himself out of a living situation. He reaches out to his ex girlfriend, Anna, and meets her sister, Sadie, who is a movie star. Through Sadie, Jake reconnects with Hugo, a stoic philosopher whose ideas Jake used without permission for his book The Silencer. The four characters are in a love square of sorts, but Jake's desperation to succeed artistically and financially are what drives the narrative.

This is a very funny novel, and much of my enjoyment came from Jake's interactions with his roommate/ridiculously loyal friend Finn. Jake is a sympathetic character despite his selfishness, and all of his mishaps are hilarious. 

A novel doesn't have to be optimistic for me to love it, but it certainly helps. This is a good read for anybody who feels like they are floundering.  

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

Dedicated to Raymond Queneau.

In 2005, the novel was one of Time magazine's one hundred best English-language novels since 1923.

UP NEXT: Lord of the Flies by William Golding

495. The Story of O

The Story of O
Pauline Reage
1954
Around 200 pages

Reage's lover/employer was an admirer of Marquis de Sade (eek), and told her that no woman was capable of penning an erotic novel. So to prove him wrong, she wrote this story in a series of letters to him and hopefully dumped him for being such a wang. A surprising number of books on this List have been completed in the name of dares. 

O's lover Rene, brings her to a chateau in Roissy to be trained to service members of an elite club, in all three of the ways. Her body is humiliated and modified to make submission easier (eek x 2), but O is a willing participant. 

Well, I'm all for being a Petty Betty and writing to spite a man. But damn, that is not the usual story I like to read. I guess if we are going to assign a larger meaning to it, we could say that the ultimate ecstasy comes from surrender, which is why people have been so obsessed with this god fella over the years.

I still think Sade was grosser, so she didn't quite succeed if that's what this contest was measuring. But personally, I was grateful that she refrained from getting scatological. I guess people still doubted that a woman wrote this, but everything seemed to be consensual, so that should have tipped them off.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Shortly before her death, Anne Desclos revealed she wrote the novel under a pen name.

UP NEXT: Under the Net by Iris Murdoch

494. A Ghost At Noon/Contempt

A Ghost at Noon/Contempt
Alberto Moravia
1954
Around 250 pages

When I find myself growing grim about the mouth in regards to this List, I always like to remind myself of all the hidden gems that I would have never discovered on my own. This novel is one of those gems, and is certainly the best of the Moravia novels on this List. 

I think everybody lives in some fear, by different degrees, that one day, they are going to wake up and their partner doesn't love them anymore. Or, in an equally tragic scenario, you wake up and you discover you've fallen out of love. Unfortunately, for our protagonist, Riccardo Molteni, this happens with his wife Emilia, who grows colder and colder as the novel progresses. 

Contempt is Disgust's bitchier older sister, and I think it is the perfect name for this novel. Riccardo is desperate to make Emilia admit she no longer loves him and why, so he can fix it. And I think we all do that with relationships to an extent. If somebody dumps us, we want to know their exact reasoning, as though that information will help us. As the story is told from Riccardo's perspective, we mostly feel sympathetic for him, but my heart ached for Emilia as well. Once that switch turns off, the other person's love really does feel like an invasion. 

Riccardo's character is a screenwriter who naturally feels he is above his trade. He is working on a production of The Odyssey, and I thoroughly enjoyed the discussions on the text. Was Odysseus a hero, or was he just coming up with excuses not to go home to his wife? I love it when characters interpret art, it's an ingenious way to show their souls. 

An excellent read, and I'll have to remember this example next time the List puts me through the ringer.

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

In Le Monde's 100 Books of the Century, published in 1999, French readers voted the book the 48th most memorable.

UP NEXT: The Story of O by Pauline Reage

493. The Go-Between

The Go-Between
L.P. Hartley
1953
Around 330 pages

The List keeps demonstrating that the books I love are all modifications of previous novels that have covered the same ground. In this case, the novel in question is Atonement, which follows a young girl who witnessed a love affair and doesn't understand what she is seeing. Actually, as a writer, I find this comforting. You don't need a completely original idea to have a good story, as the way it's presented will always be unique to your voice.

Leo Colston is a thirteen-year-old boy, being used as a Go-Between for lovers Marian and Ted. Marian is the sister of one of Leo's school chums, and is engaged to a viscount, while Ted is a poor tenant farmer. While Leo is initially naive about the nature of their relationship, he wises up enough to understand the gravity of class lines and depths of romantic love.

Ian McEwan called Atonement "an act of homage in some ways" to The Go-Between. It's easy to see why McEwan was captivated by this method of storytelling, as the child's point of view allows for intense dramatic irony. This perspective obviously has the potential to be frustrating, but I think Hartley managed to avoid being unnecessarily wide-eyed and innocent in his portrayal of a young boy. For the most part. As always, I abstain from spoilers, but I found the ending to be incredibly satisfying and poignant. 

Are British school children the meanest people on the planet?

RATING: ***--

Interesting Facts:

Adapted into a film in 1971 starring Julia Christie.

UP NEXT: A Ghost at Noon by Alberto Moravia

492. The Long Goodbye

The Long Goodbye
Raymond Chandler
1953
Around 320 pages

As much as Raymond Chandler wants us to take him seriously, I find him to be a welcome reprieve from some of the more complex novels on this List. The hard boiled detective stories are fewer and far between at this point, so I enjoy them quite a bit when they crop up.

Terry Lennox shows up on Phillip Marlowe's front step, desperate for help. Terry is Phillip's friend (i.e. drinking buddy), and begs him to get him to Tijuana. Marlowe finds out that Terry's wife, Sylvia, was recently found dead, but bros before hos, and Marlowe wants to prove Terry's innocence. Of course, some more dames and alcholics get involved.

This novel reminded me of Red Harvest, in that there was a layer of social commentary that you don't always get in your standard detective story. Chandler clearly put a lot of himself in this story; the drunk, washed up author Roger Wade seems like a self-insert. Kingsley Amis just did something similar in Lucky Jim, but Chandler seemed more vulnerable and honest with himself when portraying his stand-in's flaws. 

I wasn't blown away by the way the plot wrapped up, but it was still a solid addition to the genre.

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

Written as Chandler's wife was dying.

UP NEXT: The Go Between by L.P. Hartley

491. The Unnamable

The Unnamable
Samuel Beckett
1953
Around 190 pages

Beckett again. This time he is polishing off his trilogy, preceded by Molloy and Malone Dies. I was fully expecting the same style of abstract monologues in cramped rooms with little to no plot. God, he's predictable.

Most of this novel is one paragraph long, and I just don't really appreciate these literary gimmicks. All I really want a good story. He doesn't offer us a plot, or a main character's name, or a setting. It might have been written with the intention to be read aloud, in which case I guess it makes more sense as some sort of poetic expression. 

Not my cup of tea, and unfortunately, we still aren't even close to reaching the end of his novels on the List.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Originally published in French.

UP NEXT: The Long Goodbye by Raymond Chandler

490. Watt

Watt
Samuel Beckett
1953
Around 260 pages

Only ten more novels until the big 500. Unfortunately, for that happy moment to occur, we have to get through two Becketts in a row. Hey, I want to enjoy a novel written while hiding from the Gestapo as much as the next guy. But I don't click with his style, which is oh so very Irish.

It's difficult to summarize a Beckett novel, since so much of the action takes place in the abstract. I guess suffice to say, Watt obsesses over his employer Mr. Knott, who never appears in the novel. His experimental style made it feel like an undergrad assignment to me, where he was tasked with incorporating a certain amount of motifs into one lengthy project. 

Here's one quote to illustrate how rough it can be to get through this thing:

“Here he stood. Here he sat. Here he knelt. Here he lay. Here he moved, to and fro, from the door to the window, from the window to the door; from the window to the door, from the door to the window; from the fire to the bed, from the bed to the fire; from the bed to the fire, from the fire to the bed." I mean, are you trying to get on my nerves? Or sound like a children's book? Or fill a word count? 

We don't even get a break between Becketts, that's cold, Listmakers.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Written by Beckett on the run in France during World War II.

UP NEXT: The Unnamable by Samuel Beckett

489. Lucky Jim

Lucky Jim
Kingsley Amis
1954
Around 250 pages

Correct me if I'm wrong, but I think Kingsley and Martin are our only father-son duo on this List. Apparently ole Kingsley wasn't a fan of his son's works, but having a cold, emotionally withdrawn English father can only improve your writing, so maybe Martin was okay with it. Let's pit Amis against Amis and determine who is the A-plus, and who is the Anus.

Jim Dixon is a medieval history professor in England who has to impress the head of his department in order to secure a permanent position. These attempts are somewhat hampered by Dixon's alcoholism and his romance with the head professor's son's girlfriend. He is also being blackmailed into staying in a relationship by Margaret Peel, who is the embodiment of the emotionally unstable shrew that men are fond of putting on page. I'm not saying these women don't exist, I'm just saying we see them a lot. 

This is a comic novel, kind of a mean one, which makes sense. Kingsley once said "I've finally worked out why I don't like Americans ....Because everyone there is either a Jew or a hick." His personality bleeds into the story, making it unenjoyable for me. He seems like a very bitter man.

We didn't click and I will be sporting a Team Martin shirt from now on. He really could have benefited from therapy.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Christopher Hitchens described it as the funniest book of the second half of the 20th century, writing: "Lucky Jim illustrates a crucial human difference between the little guy and the small man. And Dixon, like his creator, was no clown but a man of feeling after all."

UP NEXT: Watt by Samuel Beckett

488. Junkie

Junkie
William S. Burroughs
1953
Around 210 pages

Welcome to the List, weirdo. I was never a fan of Burroughs. He so clearly wants to provoke me that I rebel, and want to label him "traditional." Also, novels about addiction are so tough to get through. We all know somebody on that hellpath, and it can be very emotional to dive into, even with this guy at the helm.

This is a short jaunt through the behaviors of a heroine addict in the 1950s, first in New York, then in other big cities. I wasn't really sure who the intended audience was. There was one strange moment where the narrator takes the time to tell the audience that you shouldn't drive on marijuana as it messes with your spatial awareness. It felt like a weird kind of PSA interruption. It almost felt like it was written for people who have never done drugs and want to see some glimpses of that world without getting too deep in the trenches.

Actually this wasn't nearly as disgusting as I thought it would be. I would have expected Burroughs to take full advantage of the opportunity to gross out us with body horror. I guess he did a bit, so maybe I'm just hardening in my old age. I read Trainspotting first, so nothing else has been quite as visceral as that experience.

I guess it's interesting that he is putting a spotlight on an issue which wasn't getting a ton of attention in the 1950s. But it wouldn't be on my top List of drug novels (I don't know who would be requesting this information from me).

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Burroughs recorded passages of the novel himself that were released on records.

UP NEXT: Lucky Jim by Kingsley Amis

487. Casino Royale

Casino Royale
Ian Fleming
1953
Around 215 pages

I read all of the James Bond books when I was younger, despite the fact that my dad's copies were literally falling apart at the seams. I don't know why I just didn't get them out at the library, it's not like they are obscure novels. Oh past Amanda. 

Le Chiffre, the paymaster for a French Communist Party trade union, loses 50 million francs in Soviet subsidies after investing in brothels three months before France ratifies the Loi Marthe Richard. So I guess whores do sometimes sink. Desperate to get the money back before his handlers notice, he goes to a casino in Somme with the remaining 25 million francs in union funds. Of course, everybody has already figured it out. The Russians send an assassin to finish him off, and the Brits send James Bond to beat him in cards, because they are the good guys (and they want to completely bankrupt the trade union). Also, Bond is assigned a hot female companion, Vesper, because we need somebody for him to bang. 

It's a testament to Fleming's strong writing that I could be fascinated by a game of baccarat, when I don't know how to play baccarat. And although I've never had my penis repeatedly struck by a carpet beater, I have dealt with chronic pain my whole life, and I was really blown away by Fleming's description of agony. It's not an easy thing to put into words. 

Ian Fleming might just be the biggest badass on this List, with the possible exception of Erskine Childers (but you can only be so cool if your name is Erskine). Many of the elements of the plot were inspired by real life events Fleming witnessed when he served as an intelligence officer. Those seeds of reality stop the entire story from being an unbearably over the top absurd male fantasy (at least in this story).

Let me know your favorite James Bond in the comments! And bonus points if you can guess mine.

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

James Bond was originally named James Secretan, but Ian Fleming wanted a more boring name.

Umberto Eco said Fleming isn't an artist; yet he writes with art. Oh shut up.

UP NEXT: Junkie by William Burroughs

486. The Adventures of Augie March

The Adventures of Augie March
Saul Bellow
1953
Around 600 pages

By the time this List is over, you will have had to read seven posts that can be summarized as "I don't vibe with Bellow." If we were dating, I would have to send one of those vague "it just didn't work out" texts. Unfortunately, the Book refuses to see other people, so I have to keep reading Bellow's novels even if I don't find them enjoyable.

This coming of age stories centers on Augie March, who just kind of bums around. He has a string of romances with varying levels of successes, and does random jobs when he needs money. Like many people in their early adulthood, he struggles with motivation and commitment. I thought I would relate to Augie more, given that his lack of direction is very accessible, but there's something about Bellow's writing that I find really dry.

Four more Bellows to go! Oh well, I have more time to put my finger on why I don't like this guy.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Modern Library's 81st best novel of the twentieth century. As if.

UP NEXT: Casino Royale by Ian Fleming

485. Go Tell It on the Mountain

Go Tell It On the Mountain
James Baldwin
1953
Around 260 pages

I knew this was going to be a heavy and disturbing read, but it's been awhile since the List traumatized me, so I was ready. As expected, there are certain images from this book that are going to stay with me. And I might have Amanda-nesia, but I believe this is the first novel to really tackle the life of a black gay man. Please correct me in the comments if I'm wrong.

The novel tells the story of John Grimes, a teenager in 1930s Harlem, who is raised by a violent and religious stepfather Gabriel. The novel is non linear, and often changes point of view so we learn about the history of John's entire family. Gabriel in particular is a piece of work. I'm not a religious person, so while I understood the context of the Christian elements in the story (like John's trippy visions), they didn't really resonant with me and I wish John had found another means of escape. Although all the allusions allowed me to dust off my rusty biblical knowledge; I had completely forgotten about the insane Ham story. I think I will bring it up for discussion at my boyfriend's next family dinner, after they say grace. 

I think it is strange that Christianity would be the means you would use to dismantle racism or oppression, considering the historical role it has in maintaining slavery. Of course, this novel seems to condemn the hypocritical "righteousness" of religious leaders, but I'm not sure what to make of James' spiritual transformation. I feel like you could successfully argue a pro or anti religious interpretation of the novel, which as a writer is a brilliant feat to pull off.

This story actually reminded me heavily of Call It Sleep by Henry Roth. Both feature smart protagonists whose futures' are at stake due to toxic home and life environments. And while women play more minor roles, they do have a hand in smacking down their abusers in the end.

I wouldn't say I love this novel, but I do think it is a very intentional and thought-provoking story. More Baldwin please!

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

One of Time's 100 best English-language novels released from 1923 to 2005.

In 1998, the Modern Library ranked Go Tell It on the Mountain 39 on their list of the 100 best English-language novels of the 20th century.

UP NEXT: The Adventures of Augie March by Saul Bellow

484. The Judge and His Hangman

The Judge and His Hangman
Friedrich Durrenmatt
1950
Around 128 pages

I had a bit of a hard time tracking down this novel, and when it finally arrived from a distant land (the U.K.), it was somewhat underwhelming. It is a tiny, rather adorable book, and while I am all for brevity, 128 pages isn't a whole lot of time to set up and conclude a satisfying mystery. 

Inspector Barlach's best officer, Lieutenant Ulrich Schmied, is murdered. Schmied was investigating the activities of career criminal Richard Gastmann, an old enemy of Barlach. Barlach is assisted by Officer Tschanz to crack the case. 

It's very difficult to create an original detective, even in 1950. This is something I struggle with in my own writing, as I am constantly comparing my characters to well-known literary figures ("but mine has a hat! He's different!"). Barlach isn't the most eccentric guy, but by the end of the novel, I no longer felt that Durrenmatt was trying to shock us with twists and turns narrated by Hercule - I mean, Hans. Instead, I think Durrenmatt wanted to present to the audience a very specific moral conundrum, and have us ruminate on the ethics of the actions of our protagonist. 

It's hard to evaluate the merits of a detective story without giving away spoilers, but dammit, I live by a code. Compared to other masterfully crafted detective stories that are hidden with subtle clues and memorable characters, this novel falls short. But on its own, it's a neat little story that poses some thoughtful questions. And that's fun too.

RATING: ***--

Interesting Facts:

Adapted into a film in 1975, starring Jon Voight.

UP NEXT: Go Tell It On the Mountain by James Baldwin

483. Invisible Man

Invisible Man
Ralph Ellison
1952
Around 580 pages

It's so depressing how relevant this novel is. I wish it read more like Memoirs of a Hadrian, where the world is so unrecognizable that it might as well have taken place on another planet. It would be hard to write a novel like this without wallowing in misery, but somehow Ellison is able to avoid this. 

I tend to get annoyed with the "unnamed narrator trope" but I can't deny that it works here. After all, he's an invisible man. Our narrator is a black man that receives a scholarship to an all black college, but is forced to participate in a human cockfight in front of the white donators to get it. His life is marked with all the indignities and injustices that characterize the Black experience in America.

I was amazed by how many cultural nuances he managed to capture without feeling like he's manically stuffing every stereotype in his bag at the racism clearance sale. The scholarship scene perfectly captures the fetishization of Black bodies and the humiliation that comes with white people's charity. We also get police brutality, mob scenes, and everything else that makes my heart hurt.

Native Son paved the way for a story like this, and I think I enjoyed that novel more. But this felt more hopeful, whereas Native Son felt depressingly inevitable. For that, I admire Ellison's work more than Wright's. 

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

Won the U.S. National Book Award for Fiction in 1953, making Ellison the first African American writer to win the award.

Barack Obama modeled his 1995 memoir Dreams from My Father on Ellison's novel.

UP NEXT: The Judge and His Hangman by Friedrich Durrenmatt

482. The Old Man and the Sea

The Old Man and the Sea
Ernest Hemingway
1951
Around 130 pages

Well, we've reached the last of our Ernest Hemingway novels. I'm disappointed to see the lad go, despite the fact that I would have found him insufferable in real life. I liked the fella's economy of language, and I never felt like he hated the world. RIP.

Official Hemingway ranking:

1. A Farewell to Arms

2. The Sun Also Rises
3. The Old Man and the Sea

4. For Whom the Bell Tolls

5. To Have and Have Not

As you can see, I have The Old Man and the Sea smack dab in the middle. That's what happens when you are a genius, you're constantly topping masterpieces. I think it's a great story but I've always enjoyed Hemingway's dialogue, and we don't really get that here. The Sea isn't much of a talker.

Santiago is an aging fisherman who has gone 84 days without catching a fish. I love stories that start off with such a simple premise. The writer in me wants to turn it into an exercise. Only Manolin, a young man Santiago has trained since childhood, still believes in him. Santiago finally manages to catch a marlin, but getting it back to shore is a fish of a different color.

Hemingway knows we might get bored on a boat with only an elderly man for company, so he keeps it short and simple. He also manages to resist the urge to make things too dramatic, which I would imagine would be tempting when writing a story that takes place on the high seas. I'll miss his subtlety and brevity.

If the world was good, our best novel would always be our last. But like Santiago, Hemingway's best days were behind him at this point and he knows it. Another float in our recent sadness parade.

RATING: *****

Interesting Facts:

Won the Pulitzer Prize for Fiction.

The book was reportedly a favorite of Saddam Hussein. 

UP NEXT: Invisible Man by Ralph Ellison

481. Wise Blood

Wise Blood
Flannery O'Connor
1952
Around 1952

I'm calling it, we are officially in a slump. Three flops in a row. I trust Papa to turn this ship around at the next entry. But I'm sure he has disappointed women before.

After suffering some war wounds, Hazel Motes returns to his family home in Tennessee to find it abandoned. Like many of us who were exposed to religion early, Motes is an atheist and intends to spread the religion of anti religion. He reaches out to a prostitute and becomes obsessed with spiritually corrupting a blind preacher's daughter.

Hazel is like the girl that claims to be over her boyfriend, but can't stop bashing him. From this novel it appears that O'Connor believes everybody has a god shaped hole in their heart. I'm clearly not a spiritual person, but that hasn't prevented me from enjoying religious authors on the List. However, I found every character in this story to be completely bananas, outside of their personal philosophies. Nobody reacted to anybody else's behavior in a believable way. This approach did give the story a biblical feel, but obviously that's not my style.

I think I was harder on Hazel because we've had three crazy protagonists in our last three entries, and I'm tired of reading about batshit men.

RATING: ***--

Interesting Facts:

PJ Harvey cited the novel as a huge inspiration for her writing on her album To Bring You My Love.

UP NEXT: The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway

480. The Killer Inside Me

The Killer Inside Me

Jim Thompson

1952

Around 360 pages

We have our share of ugly novels on the List. Some revel in their ugliness more than others. Naturally, novels that tackle subjects like genocide and war are going to upset the reader, but this is a separate category. I am sure this had a huge influence on Brent Easton Ellis, if that gives you any indications about where this is going.

Lou Ford is the deputy sheriff of a small Texas town and a sadistic sociopath. At the beginning of the story, he satisfies his schadenfreude by simply boring the people around him. Of course, that's not enough for Lou, who has been sexually abusing girls since he was young. He enters a BDSM relationship with Joyce, a prostitute, despite having a steady schoolteacher girlfriend. He suspects there is more to his foster brother's recent death at a construction site. 

I don't think Thompson is bad at his craft, but his craft is fixating on a brutal violence against women. And yes, Lou doesn't limit his violence to just women. But that choice allows us to do some comparing and contrasting for how the victims and their experiences are treated. And Lou's misogyny is pretty much his raison d'etre (and maybe the author's as well). 

Lou is a monster, and like all monsters, was once a victim himself. There were no images from this story that are going to haunt me forever (I am sure Thompson would be very disappointed). But I don't find stories about mentally disabled men terrorizing women quite as compelling

as others do. 

RATING: *----

Interesting Facts:

Adapted into a film in 2010, starring Casey Affleck and Jessica Alba. Ick.

20th Century Fox originally optioned the project as a possible starring vehicle for Marilyn Monroe in 1956. After her death, the project was shelved.

UP NEXT: Wise Blood by Flannery O'Connor

479. Memoirs of Hadrian

Memoirs of Hadrian
Marguerite Yourcenar
1951
Around 350 pages

Most of the time, I have a blast with these entries, but every once in awhile we get a book that feels like it was created for the sole purpose of hurting college students. I had a professor, let's call him Ronald Judy (because that's his name, and he was an ass), whose arrogance left me in awe. He would stroll into class twenty minutes late and then keep us for an extra 30 minutes because he physically could not spouting his ego on us. Being hit over the head with Ars Poetica is one thing, because it's Greek and I guess they figured out the universe or something. But this is just pretend classical, so what gives?

Hadrian was an Emperor of Rome, roughly 2000 years ago. The novel is presented as a letter by Hadrian to his successor/adoptive grandson Marcus Aurelius. As he is dying, Hadrian thinks this is a good time to reflect on the events of his life. I guess by Machiavellian standards, Hadrian is a good emperor, but he's still a huge dick.

The real Hadrian did write an autobiography, but it has been lost. I never felt the pangs of this loss, but Yourcenar did. This just isn't my taste, I have a hard time relating to these ancient men who were obsessed with young boys and plagued by fits of rage and paranoia. And if I was going to spend the intellectual credit needed to get through a book like this, I would want it to be the real deal.

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Yourcenar chose Hadrian as the subject of the novel because he lived at a time when the Roman gods were no longer believed in, but Christianity was not yet established. 

UP NEXT: The Killer Inside Me by Jim Thompson

478. The Day of Triffids

The Day of the Triffids
John Wyndham
1951
Around 305 pages

Gods bless John Wyndham. I really needed a story like this to break up our current losing streak. Even the recent solid entries weren't exactly fun. But Wyndham knows how to write a wildly entertaining novel, with a clear Wellsian influence. 

Bill Masen wakes up in the hospital to discover that everybody has gone blind after witnessing a green meteor shower. Bill was spared, as his eyes were bandaged after being splashed by triffid poison. Triffids are tall carnivorous plants capable of walking around and while I know that might strike some people as cheesy, I actually find the idea pretty fucking terrifying.  Bill worked with triffids and has kept his sight, so he's a bit more prepared than most when the triffids start scuttling around all over the place. 

Wyndham didn't have to go that hard. I would have settled for a Night of the Living Dead type story, where our main characters hole up somewhere and trying to survive a siege of monsters. But Wyndham goes deeper than that. I thought the blindness element was brilliant and added an extra layer of complexity to the adventure. Bill not only had to navigate the Deku Babas, but he also has to deal with the rest of humanity, who are blind and pissed off.

I think I would rather feed myself to a triffid than join one of those post apocalyptic sex cults. My only criticism was that the story fell off a bit by the end. But hey, he had incredible momentum at the beginning, and it's hard to keep that going until the end of the story.  

RATING: ****-

Interesting Facts:

Inspiration for 28 Days Later. Of course, they replaced plant monsters with zombies. I wonder who would win in a fight?

In 2021, the novel was one of six classic science fiction novels by UK authors selected by Royal Mail to feature on a series of British postage stamps.

UP NEXT: Memoirs of Hadrian by Marguerite Yourcenar

477. Malone Dies

Malone Dies
Samuel Beckett
1951

Around 130 pages

It's rare, but once in awhile I'll hate an author, and then I stumble upon one novel from their oeuvre I enjoy. Henry James is the example that immediately comes to mind. So each time I pick up the next Beckett novel, I have the vague hope of clicking with the text. And then Beckett dashes my dreams against a wall and makes a fart joke.

Malone is an old guy/crazed murderer who is bedridden in an asylum. He's sort of telling his story, and sort of telling the story of Sapo, who might also be him? He also changes Sapo's name in the middle of the novel, because Beckett hates his readers.

Unfortunately, Malone Dies is very similar to Molloy, as the novels are part of a trilogy. At least Beckett only makes us suffer for 130 pages or so.

RATING: *----

Interesting Facts:

Broadcast on the radio in 1958.

UP NEXT: The Day of the Triffids by John Wyndham

476. Foundation

Foundation
Isaac Asimov
1951
Around 255 pages

I honestly can't wait until we get to The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy. So far we are getting very serious novels that unironically use terms like "Galactic Empire." There are certain elements of this universe I enjoy, but overall, I don't find Asimov to be a particularly compelling storyteller.

In 12,067 GE, Hari Seldon has developed psychohistory, a new field of science that can basically predict the future using math. Seldon discovers that the empire will collapse in 300 years, to be followed by a 30000 year dark age. Naturally, the Powers That Be don't want to hear that, but Seldon has a solution. By creating a total compendium of human knowledge, the Encyclopedia Galactica, the dark age can be reduced to a thousand years. He accepts the Empire's offer to complete the work on the remote planet of Terminus with another mathematician. 

I enjoyed the concept of the story more than the execution. Asimov is just so dry. His style lends the story credibility, as you do feel like you are reading a true account of humanity in its death throes. The world he presented wasn't one that I am tempted to revisit again and again, but points for creativity.

RATING: ***--

Interesting Facts:

Elon Musk counts the series among the inspirations for his career. Thanks Asimov!

Won the one-time Hugo Award for "Best All-Time Series" in 1966.

UP NEXT: Malone Dies by Samuel Beckett

475. The Opposing Shore

The Opposing Shore
Julien Gracq
1951

Around 355 pages

Some novels you spend the entire time waiting for something to happen, in an intentional way. All of the examples I can think of were written after this, so I guess this is the OG of sitting around waiting for stuff. It's not my favorite, but it should still get props for being number one.

Two countries, Orsenna and Farghestan, have been at war for hundreds of years, but no fighting has taken place for decades. Our main character Aldo is fascinated by the border, and would probably have a solo song called What Lies Beyond if this were a Disney movie. 

I don't really like the style of surrealism, and while I appreciate the emphasis put on waiting around (that's what life boils down to after all), it doesn't make for the most compelling read. 

RATING: **---

Interesting Facts:

Awarded the Prix Goncourt, but Gracq refused to accept the prize as a protest against commercial compromising in world literature.

UP NEXT: Foundation by Isaac Asimov